Doctors with ears

What a difference it makes between a doctor and a doctor with ears! My father has been seeing a very prominent Nephrologyst with his kidney problems for months now. His frustration has been growing from day one as this doctor spends so little time listening to the symptoms of his life threatening illness. I went with my father one morning for his 3rd visit to this guy and saw the whole "I am a doctor, you are nobody" attitude. After two hours of waiting outside his office, when we finally got to see him, he was on his newly-bought iPhone. We get in, he shows us to have a seat, continuing his conversation. Five whole minutes later, he tells the person on the phone, "I got somebody in front of me. It will be a few minutes.. and let me call you back". I felt like taking that iPhone, throwing it on the floor, stomping on it and then tell him, "We pay your salary. You work for us. The only reason you have that iPphone is because we pay you. Get off that phone and give us what you owe us.. your time and expertise. not a few of your annoyed-minutes".

No, he is too good of a doctor (don't know how and why, other than what his degree says). So, I politely smiled at him instead and my father started telling him his itching of skins, fever, pain and other recent changes in his body as his kidneys have been losing functionality.

Mr. Doctor had one answer after he cut him short abruptly, "I told you to start dialysis, there is nothing else I can do for you." May be it is true that there were nothing else he could do. However, he could have said in many ways to a seriously ill patient that is fighting for his life. With a little more listening, a bit more care and a whole lot of passion. Psychology, Social Science were two subjects that were vital in undergrad school and I use what I learnt to this day. Do these doctors go through any interpersonal skill building courses? If not, why not? If yes, what happens to them as they become more successful?

Last week, my father went to a famous doctor in Singapore to explore other options for his kidney treatment. He called me and told me, "this doctor listend to me for two hours!" In half a dozen visit, we could not get 30 minutes from the famous nephrpologyst. And here in another country, we get two hours the first time! Next visit was no diffeernt. Granted, it costs a lot more to see a doctor in Singapore. However, I doubt that the other guy behaves poorly because he receives less. Whatever are his scheduled payments, we pay. He just doesn't have it or doesn't get it. Not listening to the patients and just trying to cut their time short is a common practice among many doctors in many 3rd world countries. This needs to change and change soon.

Patients are flocking to other countries and spending thousands for almost similar or may be a tad-bit better treatment simply because they feel their doctors aren't listening to them. Without listening carefully to all the symptoms, how can a doctor give you the best medicine?

Doctors must listen before they speak!